Imagine you have bitten your cheek once or twice during the day and now have a painless but everpresent little piece of skin occasionally brushing against your teeth and tongue. All day.<\/p>\n
Then imagine, that like me, you cannot stand its being there and for the better part of your day you contort your face trying to wedge the piece between your canines and snip it cleanly, leaving your mouth free from distraction.<\/p>\n
Now imagine if you believed that this method was the best way to solve every problem you’ve ever had.<\/p>\n
I’m pretty sure that’s what it’s like to be a dog.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Imagine you have bitten your cheek once or twice during the day and now have a painless but everpresent little piece of skin occasionally brushing against your teeth and tongue. All day. Then imagine, that like me, you cannot stand its being there and for the better part of your day you contort your face […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s73iP8-imagine","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":678,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=678","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":0},"title":"True destiny","date":"11\/1\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Make yourself aware of the facets of this piece (and I use that term in several senses): the substitution of \"ur\" for \"your\" seemingly to save typographical real estate, or to connect to the hip IM-blogosphere, or both; the arcane SUTD acronym that therefore arises; the creation of a vaguely\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"\/images\/blog\/true_destiny.jpg","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":123,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=123","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":1},"title":"This is so on.","date":"5\/5\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"Bjorn and I are likely candidates for live-action Pacman. In fact, I can't imagine it existing and our not partaking. It's like our clones live in New York or something. No, you're not invited. But if we get the Minibosses play our gig, you can carry their shit if they'll\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "For the geek in you"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":101,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=101","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":2},"title":"Blogs itself, really.","date":"4\/13\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"So this is what happens when the National Endowment for the Arts reaches rock bottom. I cannot imagine what marijuana creates this sort of idiotic juxtaposition, \"NASCAR Ballet centers around 20 ballet and modern dancers (who represent cars) who circle a forty foot horseshoe track that banks around the corner\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1143,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=1143","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":3},"title":"Parallel paradigm.","date":"4\/7\/2010","format":false,"excerpt":"Frightened Rabbit - \"I Feel Better\" from This is What We Imagine on Vimeo. More on this in the NPR article that referenced the video.","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":247,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=247","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":4},"title":"She is not her fucking khakis.","date":"2\/15\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Carolyn, who is a hardcore stuntchick, entered the Milwaukee Rumble this year and held her own. Next year, she'll win and I will get my participant badge. I have some apprehension about entering it, as I don't imagine I'll get out of there without a broken nose. I'm not really\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Self-service"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":526,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=526","url_meta":{"origin":147,"position":5},"title":"Yeah. Way too close.","date":"3\/13\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Jack Handey is still working, and is still hilarious. The \"Made You Look\" idea reminds me of this creepy and ridiculously ambitious episode of Too Close for Comfort where the main character has a Dorian Gray-style portrait. Imagine you're a four-year old at your grandmother's house around bedtime. And there's\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Link Larceny"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/147"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=147"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/147\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=147"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=147"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=147"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}