advice<\/a> for those whose romantic wellspring has dried up. Or more likely in this case, been poisoned by some dastardly fellow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"No skill at poetry? Can’t ballroom dance? Still want to woo that perfect lady? Why not send a cow to Ethiopia? The brilliant Seanbaby researches advice for those whose romantic wellspring has dried up. Or more likely in this case, been poisoned by some dastardly fellow.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/s73iP8-swoon","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":331,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=331","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":0},"title":"“Write Post,” say you WordPress? I shall.","date":"6\/17\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"After reading a few other blogs, whose authors possess more discipline and skill than I likely retain, I came to a small - very small - epiphany. Part of my inability to make myself write when I want and how I want springs from what I would politely label efficiency,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Self-service"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":570,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=570","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":1},"title":"2006 summer schedule","date":"5\/18\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"A list of movies I will watch in theaters in 2006: The Da Vinci Code - Though the prose was amateurish, I did find it suspenseful, and there hasn't been an Indiana Jones movie in a while. Xmen: The Last Stand - This will likely be crap, but I like\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "For the geek in you"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1064,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=1064","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":2},"title":"Fucked up, now I’m down.","date":"8\/19\/2009","format":false,"excerpt":"I know I fucked up, but what can I do? I never got used to loving you. Watching options walk the street Even with you, I was incomplete. Now in empty rooms, I sit and dream Of what we were and could have been. \"It is not fair,\" I hear\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Poetry"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":793,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=793","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":3},"title":"Guns of Summer","date":"7\/28\/2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Over the weekend, I spent most of my time doing something rather uncharacteristic of me. I fired firearms of various makes and models. No bullets, but lots of noise and smoke. It was a lot of fun. I have noticed that I want to entertain with my writing, so I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":669,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=669","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":4},"title":"OFN and the human condition.","date":"9\/19\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Earlier today, like a good little member of the online social community (in which, my circle has grown by 4 friend requests just today, so eat it), I changed my Facebook status. I changed it to read \"Christopher is ... a lone monkey contemplating infinity.\" I heard the phrase somewhere\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":286,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=286","url_meta":{"origin":15,"position":5},"title":"The Wedding: Reception","date":"3\/28\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"The reservation casino which hosted the reception was vast and Vegas-like. Due to our misplacing of the invitation, MHG and I were not staying in the casino hotel with the rest of the wedding party. And so, we milled about the reception hall after dropping off the exceedingly heavy place\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Self-service"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=15"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=15"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=15"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=15"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}