All right. I’m not going to bore you with the details. What I’ve been doing would reduce your respect for the Buddha in so many ways. For one, I have been to Sears. You see? Right there. You did that thing with your eyes. You say you want me to talk to you, but then you sit there in judgment.<\/p>\n
So, just stay in here and I’ll be in the bedroom and get some reading done. And if you have to use the bathroom, just don’t worry about those sounds coming from the bedroom, the bed creaking and the gentle sobs of shame. Ignore them.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
All right. I’m not going to bore you with the details. What I’ve been doing would reduce your respect for the Buddha in so many ways. For one, I have been to Sears. You see? Right there. You did that thing with your eyes. You say you want me to talk to you, but then […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p73iP8-2A","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":10,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=10","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":0},"title":"Big Ol Return","date":"8\/16\/2003","format":false,"excerpt":"Finally...The Buddha...has come back...to his blog. So much has happened and I have this long list of things I've wanted to put here. I'll start, however, anti-choronologically with a conversation my girlfriend and I recently had through the bathroom door. Buddha: (on the toilet, reading) Most-Honoured Girlfriend: (disdainful tone) Well,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Best of the Buddha"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2867,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=2867","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":1},"title":"For what am I grateful?","date":"3\/22\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"She said \u00e2\u20ac\u201d to her, but I heard it \u00e2\u20ac\u201d \"Some people would love to have to make that choice.\" Deflections followed, the necessary defense. Who would want their problems diminished? We are our problems. I am, I know. They say you cannot prove a negative, but I am proof.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":86,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=86","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":2},"title":"Smell that? That’s change.","date":"3\/29\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"This steelbuddha thing had its merits, to be sure, but an online moniker needs to be closer to the personality behind it. Although I've got the makings of a buddha forged from iron alloys, I think it more appropriate that you all refer to me by my newly realized pseudonym,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Link Larceny"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":301,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=301","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":3},"title":"The Kat Downs Post","date":"4\/15\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"I met her as Kween Schwa, the St. Norbert's College homecoming queen nominee from BIG (the frat independent group with which I had become affiliated through constant contact with its members). But almost everyone else knew her as Kat, an endearing and beautiful woman with a smile that could knock\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Best of the Buddha"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":1099,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=1099","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":4},"title":"8 jobs. 8 jobs? 8. Jobs.","date":"10\/26\/2009","format":false,"excerpt":"Why no blogging, Buddha? In previous weeks, I have had no just cause, but for the next two, I have 8 just causes. I am working the equivalent of 8 (at least part-time) jobs: GS Design (my real job) The New Century (my current show) La Cage aux Folles (my\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":293,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=293","url_meta":{"origin":160,"position":5},"title":"My dreams, they aren’t as empty as my burrito","date":"4\/5\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"First bite taken indicated possible problem. Upon further examination... ...I was cheated. And Subway reaped the benefits of Tina's Burrito Betrayal. In a related story, Google reports Limp Bizkit before the Who when doing a search for \"Behind Blue Eyes.\" Not Google's fault, of course. It's yours.","rel":"","context":"In "Best of the Buddha"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/160"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=160"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/160\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=160"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=160"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=160"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}