James Lipton’s famous questions as answered by an overstressed wannabe Buddhist.<\/p>\n
1. What is your favorite word?
\nSandwich.<\/p>\n
2. What is your least favorite word?
\nManagement.<\/p>\n
3. What turns you on?
\nSmooth skin. Shiny hair. Lips that move like they’re in some kind of 300 frame-per-second animation. Winks. Tattoos. Sly or coy conversation. That heart-stopping moment when you’re still teasing each other that you might not kiss.<\/p>\n
4. What turns you off?
\nSurrendering to minutiae and not the moment.<\/p>\n
5. What sound do you love?
\nWater: waves, drips, sloshing, rain. Even sometimes having water in my ears.<\/p>\n
6. What sound do you hate?
\nTeeth on forks.<\/p>\n
7. What is your favorite curse word?
\nFucktard.<\/p>\n
8. What profession, other than yours, would you like to attempt?
\nProfessor, martial arts stuntman, actor. <\/p>\n
9. What profession would you not like to participate in?
\nClerk. Librarian. Accountant.<\/p>\n
10. If Heaven exists, what would you like God to say, when you arrive at the pearly gates?
\nYup, I do exist, and you were right, I found that funny. Wanna split this ice cream sandwich with me?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
James Lipton’s famous questions as answered by an overstressed wannabe Buddhist. 1. What is your favorite word? Sandwich. 2. What is your least favorite word? Management. 3. What turns you on? Smooth skin. Shiny hair. Lips that move like they’re in some kind of 300 frame-per-second animation. Winks. Tattoos. Sly or coy conversation. That heart-stopping […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[2],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p73iP8-3F","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":505,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=505","url_meta":{"origin":227,"position":0},"title":"Celebrity house-cleaning.","date":"2\/14\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"The Onion puts into words what we've all been feeling since the slow decline of the meaning of the word celebrity. (I was going to add more prepositional phrases there until I could no longer stand it, but it turns out three is my limit). I Don't Wonder What Jesse\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":459,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=459","url_meta":{"origin":227,"position":1},"title":"I don’t believe in isms…","date":"1\/4\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"A friend emailed me this, but rather than pick and choose who to send it to and flood inboxes, I put it on my blog, where it probably belongs. -- Change all the answers so they apply to you, and then send this to a whole bunch of people including\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Self-service"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":213,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=213","url_meta":{"origin":227,"position":2},"title":"How do you say “noodles” and not sound stupid?","date":"10\/25\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"So, this is a public apology to Czeltic Girl, who in the last few weeks has patiently withstood a hat trick of irrational complaining on my part. 1. 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Clare has them\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2974,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=2974","url_meta":{"origin":227,"position":4},"title":"Prompted #3019304","date":"9\/23\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"My favorite way to spend the day is normally via escapism. I know that my most serene times have been sitting alone with a computer or console, discovering the story os a captivating video game, or movie, or sometimes book. I don't have the reverence that others do for reading.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":672,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=672","url_meta":{"origin":227,"position":5},"title":"Perhaps you can trust this Apple, Eve.","date":"10\/3\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"Found on Digg, 8 reasons Windows users don't switch. 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These stickers had expanded\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/227"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=227"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/227\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=227"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=227"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=227"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}