{"id":676,"date":"2007-10-24T09:33:58","date_gmt":"2007-10-24T14:33:58","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=676"},"modified":"2007-10-26T14:24:26","modified_gmt":"2007-10-26T19:24:26","slug":"right-now","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=676","title":{"rendered":"Right now…"},"content":{"rendered":"

Right now, my reputation is soiled. The reputation of a thousand years is determined in a single moment.<\/em><\/p>\n

Right now, I am being judged for my faith in another person. Beware of how you take away hope from any human being.<\/em><\/p>\n

Right now, people want more from me than I am able or willing to give. The Master can keep giving because there is no end to her wealth. She acts without expectation, succeeds without taking credit, and doesn’t think that she is better than anyone else.<\/em><\/p>\n

Right now, there is nothing I can do but push forward. If you’re going through hell, keep going.<\/em><\/p>\n

EDIT<\/strong>: This is not so dire as it might sound. It is more of a conversation between my two selves.<\/p>\n

EDIT, part 2<\/strong>: The concern of my friends is very kind, but really I am fine. Sorry to alarm anyone.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Right now, my reputation is soiled. The reputation of a thousand years is determined in a single moment. Right now, I am being judged for my faith in another person. Beware of how you take away hope from any human being. Right now, people want more from me than I am able or willing to […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p73iP8-aU","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":793,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=793","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":0},"title":"Guns of Summer","date":"7\/28\/2008","format":false,"excerpt":"Over the weekend, I spent most of my time doing something rather uncharacteristic of me. I fired firearms of various makes and models. No bullets, but lots of noise and smoke. It was a lot of fun. I have noticed that I want to entertain with my writing, so I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":242,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=242","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":1},"title":"Valentines for vets","date":"2\/11\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Here's a synopsis of how this works. 1. MHG has best intentions. She wants to send Valentines to vets. Very nice. 2. At the last moment, she gets an idea to give our gaming group the opportunity to help out.. 3. She is unavailable to make this happen and asks\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":643,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=643","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":2},"title":"In like Flynn.","date":"2\/27\/2007","format":false,"excerpt":"I missed a call at 7p.m. from the director. Then I missed her again at 9. Her voicemail was vague, simply asking for a call back. So I frantically dialed her, over and over, baffled at the busy signal which I have not heard in years. Finally, at 9:18, she\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2888,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=2888","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":3},"title":"The Powers That Be","date":"5\/13\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"Considering my size, I get pushed around a lot. I think I was told early in life that a bully is the worst thing one could be. Or maybe, because I felt bullied by so many people, I found it the worst thing. Even when people assert themselves with the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":302,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=302","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":4},"title":"Really?","date":"4\/21\/2005","format":false,"excerpt":"Someone said to me, about Jenna Jameson, \"She's really smart!\" The tone of voice used was one of incredulity, of surprise. And while I'm still too much of a social pussy to have snapped back with a witty comment, my brain did stammer a bit at the clear obliviousness of\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2917,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=2917","url_meta":{"origin":676,"position":5},"title":"Listicle","date":"7\/5\/2016","format":false,"excerpt":"I can't seem to motivate myself to write here, but I want to nonetheless; therefore, I'll compile a simple list to get myself started, or at least finished. Ten things that happened while I was away: I created some excellent, short pieces of fight choreography, one or two of which\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/676"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=676"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/676\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=676"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=676"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=676"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}