{"id":79,"date":"2004-03-18T11:46:22","date_gmt":"2004-03-18T15:46:22","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=79"},"modified":"2004-03-18T11:46:22","modified_gmt":"2004-03-18T15:46:22","slug":"halle-officially-barrys-her-second-comic-character","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=79","title":{"rendered":"Halle officially Barry’s her second comic character"},"content":{"rendered":"

The new Catwoman movie<\/a> makes me wonder just what is up Hollywood’s butt. Catwoman<\/a>, the holy pillar<\/a> of sexy<\/a> superheroines<\/a>, now needs to bare her midriff and show some cleavage to pass the Hollywoody test? Jesus, have you seen Lee Meriweather<\/a>? That catsuit put a lot of men my age into instant puberty. Though I don’t know what the makeup artist’s obsession with spiking Julie Newmar’s eyebrows<\/a> was about.<\/p>\n

At least they didn’t skimp on the story<\/a>. “Let’s make her a hot zombie again, that worked for Tim Burton. And let’s make her a cosmetic saleswoman, because the living symbol for a strong woman oughta be not too bright and know how to make herself up for her man. <\/p>\n

Who can we get to play her? Well, Halle Barry tests well in geek audiences having played Storm and a Bond girl. Plus, she won an Oscar and showed her boobies in Swordfish! Not to mention we can get a free ethnicity boon! Perfect!”<\/p>\n

Despite the decidedly lame color-based names given to half of the characters, DC Comics are well-written and have some of the greatest characters in our modern mythos. Why can’t they take the Marvel route and follow the stories<\/a> they already have? Spiderman was practically word for word* for the first hour, and it worked perfectly, even for the fanboys.<\/p>\n

If my hopes for the new Batman movie are shattered by a steaming pile like Catwoman promises to be, I may have to swear off DC movies altogether. I’m sure they’re scared.<\/p>\n

* – replacing the original “Radioactive” buzzword with the updated “Genetically Engineered”.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The new Catwoman movie makes me wonder just what is up Hollywood’s butt. Catwoman, the holy pillar of sexy superheroines, now needs to bare her midriff and show some cleavage to pass the Hollywoody test? Jesus, have you seen Lee Meriweather? That catsuit put a lot of men my age into instant puberty. Though I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":38,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_is_tweetstorm":false,"jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false}}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p73iP8-1h","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":125,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=125","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":0},"title":"People in medieval times were ugly.","date":"5\/5\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"Not to be a punk, but I'm going to have to disagree with Keiko here and pan King Arthur straight away. I don't know every version of the legend, but I'm pretty sure none of them involved Guinevere's exposed midriff. Don't get me wrong, this is the most fortunate mistake\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":553,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=553","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":1},"title":"Better than a sitcom.","date":"5\/4\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"This morning, I woke up slightly before my 7a.m. alarm. When this happens, I roll over and press up against my girlfriend. Her skin is always slightly warmer and softer than mine, so she makes a fine body pillow. Some call this behavior \"spooning.\" The issue with \"spooning,\" as the\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Best of the Buddha"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=5","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":2},"title":"non-sequitir","date":"5\/2\/2003","format":false,"excerpt":"So, I accused my girlfriend last night of having absolutely no train of thought. Where her train should be, she has a technologically superior thought-transmission device which merely transports her active consciousness from one place in her expansive and alien brain to another instantaneously and without connection to its previous\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Self-service"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":2729,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=2729","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":3},"title":"And when you can’t crawl…","date":"11\/4\/2015","format":false,"excerpt":"And when you can't write, let others do it for you. I'm sitting here, compulsively checking facebook, waiting for any one person to give me any validation, ignoring the \"likes\" I hate and the posts that probably mean the most. I have fully committed to an avoidant personality. In trying\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Ennui"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":82,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=82","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":4},"title":"Movie Review: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind","date":"3\/22\/2004","format":false,"excerpt":"One of the most beautifully executed films I've seen, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind redeems my faith in good movie-making. With the Hollywood machine churning out a daily ration of schlock, it's refreshing to have a screenwriter who takes you on an unexpected and visually stunning ride, while never\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Too Little Too Late Reviews"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":463,"url":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/?p=463","url_meta":{"origin":79,"position":5},"title":"Heroic.","date":"1\/6\/2006","format":false,"excerpt":"Jonathan Coulton makes movies and songs, a thing a week. A very noble goal, so far with excellent results. Thanks to Czeltic Girl, her boy (Elroy?) and Keiko for keeping me informed. Flickr movie Baby Got Back I reposted them on my site, but claim no credit for them. I'm\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Link Larceny"","img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]}],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79"}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/38"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=79"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/79\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=79"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=79"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.steelbuddha.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=79"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}